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pabloglycemic in fattie_rage

Is there any way to change somebody's mind?

Especially when that somebody is the most privileged fuck you've ever had the misfortune to meet?

Let's call him Dick - I frequently do. Dick thinks that everyone outside his norm owes him an explanation and an education. Unfortunately for the both of us, Dick has the narrowest norm I've ever come across. It includes only those who are skinny, white, Christian, Daily-Mail-reading, rich, middle class, male, and English. The last one is ironic as the both of us are at a university outside of England (though it does have a fairly large proportion of English people).

My friend Sean and I were having a conversation about how patriarchy pressures women into one set mode of femininity. During this, Dick came up with some particularly stupid statements (such as "women are genetically programmed to wear make-up" and "girls who wear short skirts should take responsibility when they get raped") which, for the most part, I managed to ignore.

Until we started talking about weight. And Dick butts in with this gem: "well, if I was in charge of hiring, I would hire a pretty girl over a fat girl."

I was temporarily gobsmacked by how much was wrong with that statement that the most I managed to come up with was: "dude, you're trying to find efficient workers, not sleep with them."

"Oh, I know, but I'll have to look at them all day, and I don't want to have to look at a fat girl all day. Anyway, if they're fat they're obviously not going to work as hard."

At that point I was raging enough to give either him or me a nosebleed. So instead of engaging with him, I just walked away.

Later on he resumed the conversation and we got a little further. The only thing I managed to change his mind on was his idea that all fat people eat unhealthily. This, by the way, coming from a guy who still has his mother do most of his cooking for him, and thinks fishfingers and toast makes a healthy balanced meal. The rest of it was just the usual recycled obesity timebomb crap.

So back to my original question: is there any way to change somebody's mind? Not just the little facts, but the core assumptions? It's so fucking hard to be around him right now that I need some community opinion as to whether or not I should bother continuing.


Honestly? From what you've said so far, I'd say don't continue. He doesn't sound like someone I'd want in my life at all.
it's one thing to try to convince someone who has been educated incorrectly, who has been raised being told fat is bad, who has their own issues with weight, and it's completely another issue to try to convince someone who just really likes making other people feel inferior to themselves.

April 2012

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